Hope is Real!

I talk honestly and openly about my experiences with mental illness, fibromyalgia, and chronic fatigue syndrome through the lens of feminism and process theology. I also do recipe and book reviews.

#art
#recovery #change #beauty #art #mindfulness

Church Going by Philip Larkin

Once I am sure there’s nothing going on
I step inside, letting the door thud shut.
Another church: matting, seats, and stone,
And little books; sprawlings of flowers, cut
For Sunday, brownish now; some brass and stuff
Up at the holy end; the small neat organ;
And a tense, musty, unignorable silence,
Brewed God knows how long. Hatless, I take off
My cycle-clips in awkward reverence,

Move forward, run my hand around the font.
From where I stand, the roof looks almost new-
Cleaned or restored? Someone would know: I don’t.
Mounting the lectern, I peruse a few
Hectoring large-scale verses, and pronounce
“Here endeth” much more loudly than I’d meant.
The echoes snigger briefly. Back at the door
I sign the book, donate an Irish sixpence,
Reflect the place was not worth stopping for.

Yet stop I did: in fact I often do,
And always end much at a loss like this,
Wondering what to look for; wondering, too,
When churches fall completely out of use
What we shall turn them into, if we shall keep
A few cathedrals chronically on show,
Their parchment, plate, and pyx in locked cases,
And let the rest rent-free to rain and sheep.
Shall we avoid them as unlucky places?

Or, after dark, will dubious women come
To make their children touch a particular stone;
Pick simples for a cancer; or on some
Advised night see walking a dead one?
Power of some sort or other will go on
In games, in riddles, seemingly at random;
But superstition, like belief, must die,
And what remains when disbelief has gone?
Grass, weedy pavement, brambles, buttress, sky,

A shape less recognizable each week,
A purpose more obscure. I wonder who
Will be the last, the very last, to seek
This place for what it was; one of the crew
That tap and jot and know what rood-lofts were?
Some ruin-bibber, randy for antique,
Or Christmas-addict, counting on a whiff
Of gown-and-bands and organ-pipes and myrrh?
Or will he be my representative,

Bored, uninformed, knowing the ghostly silt
Dispersed, yet tending to this cross of ground
Through suburb scrub because it held unspilt
So long and equably what since is found
Only in separation - marriage, and birth,
And death, and thoughts of these - for whom was built
This special shell? For, though I’ve no idea
What this accoutred frowsty barn is worth,
It pleases me to stand in silence here;

A serious house on serious earth it is,
In whose blent air all our compulsions meet,
Are recognised, and robed as destinies.
And that much never can be obsolete,
Since someone will forever be surprising
A hunger in himself to be more serious,
And gravitating with it to this ground,
Which, he once heard, was proper to grow wise in,
If only that so many dead lie round.

(Source: rationalresponders.com)

Fall Coping Skills for S.A.D. & Anxiety

1. Use a Light Box Every Morning! (I forgot last year-won’t do that again.) A lightbox is an electronic box that emits 10,000 lux, which fools your brain into thinking that you are underneath the sun. You use it for at least fifteen minutes a day. I have a small one that sits on my kitchen table and I simply turn it on while I eat breakfast and read in the morning. I know it may sound a little weird, but it does boost my energy level, motivation, and mood quite a bit. The one I use is called, “Lightphoria,” and I got it for about fifty dollars. My only caution is that if you have bipolar disorder, you do not want to use it more than forty-five minutes a day, because than you could become too happy and may end up manic.

2. When It Is Sunny, Be Outside! Fall and Spring are the two best times of year for people with bad joints, like me, to walk. Hot weather makes joints swell and painful, but cooler weather makes walking much more pleasant. I find that I enjoy walking so much more in the Fall than I do in the Summer and I can usually walk longer and more strenuous trails too, which is exciting.

3. Mindfully Appreciate Fall Beauty. The trees have not yet started changing colors down here in Georgia, but they will soon. The changing leaves, dancing flames in a bonfire, the harvest moon are all a part of fall that are especially beautiful and can be calming if I take the time to notice and fully appreciate them

4. Self Soothe by Drinking Seasonal Hot Teas & Lattes. Tea and coffee make me feel so comforted. Take a sip and then a long, deep breath-you will feel so relaxed.

5. Mindfully Cook Seasonal Food. While you are sipping on your hot tea, get out your seasonal vegetables and prepare a simple crock pot meal or a soup. Besides nourishing my body with good food, I actually feel relaxed while cooking because I put my whole mind into the activity. But then, I already enjoy cooking. If cooking stresses you out, you can skip this one.

6. Look Forward to & Plan a Holiday. Holidays can seem boring if you do them the same way year after year, but having something to look forward to can help bring excitement and pleasure. I am looking forward to attending the Little Five Points Halloween Parade for the first time and to attending a friend’s costume party.

babycakesbriauna:

walkingthenarrowway:

sapphrikah:

butwilltherebetea:

Rock Newman on The Phil Donahue Show sharing his experiences as a black man who has passed as white. 

Literally just said this the other day

Tell them again, because they act real hard of hearing when we explain this shit.

but they don’t hear u doeee.

Always reblog

(Source: exgynocraticgrrl, via danishshieldmaiden)

folkshitup:

Good news everyone

folkshitup:

Good news everyone

(via lgbtlaughs)

http://feministbatwoman.tumblr.com/post/98505197352/im-uncomfortable-with-white-people-saying-the

feministbatwoman:

juliohuxtable:

feministbatwoman:

I’m uncomfortable with white people saying the word “blacks” (as opposed to “black people”). It feels dehumanizing. Am I right, or am I making up a distinction that isn’t there?

(The context here is that I went to a panel about police brutality against black people)
(and the white professor of…

I agree. When I hear I just assume that that particular white person is trying to create a distance between black people and humanity. As if they are referring to a thing akin to a chair or an acorn. The language that is created to code their disgust of our mere existence is horrible. They don’t realise how debasing and utterly destructive these words are to us. Or maybe they do and that’s why they do it

That’s a really great way of explaining the gross feeling I had in my stomach the whole time that dude was talking. Thank you. 

(it makes it even more depressing that he teaches sociology at a primarily POC college) 

(blurgh) 
(ACADEMIA!) 

lindsaur-gor:

There needs to be a code word or something that means “my brain is fighting me every step of the way today and I feel like I’m going to vibrate out of my skin, so I need you to forgive everything and go slowly and speak softly and lower your expectations.” And then we could all just be like, “I know I said we could go to a movie tonight but… tangerines.” And the other person would nod and squeeze your elbow or rub your head and you wouldn’t feel like a failure.

(Source: krissyboarden, via lifeasa-fatgirl)

I took a mental health day and feel much better now.  Sometimes our bodies need to rest.
iamthethunder:

graphicallyill:

I love this paper my disability department gave me. The representative also told me to report ANY kind of ableism, even if it seems minuscule to me.
The top three are hard to read so:
Disability accommodations are rights, not special help. (Ask for what you need. Advocate for yourself.)
You are an important and valuable part of campus diversity. (Diversity includes disability.)
College disability services officers can be gatekeepers. (Most are good allies for students, but some are not. Demand professional, individualized, respectful services and file a complaint if you don’t get them.)

Captioning the rest for screenreader accessibility:
4. Feed your soul and body- recharge your batteries.  Balance your valuable time, energy, and health.
5. Stay focused on your career.  If it won’t help you get a job or maintain your passion for college, don’t bother.
6. Find a community.  Never go it alone.  Consider connecting with others who have disabilities.
7. Universally design your own learning.  Learn how you learn best, and then use your strengths and unique learning style.
8. Never apologize for your disability or your accommodations.  If you apologize, people may think you are ashamed.
9. Fight oppression and bullying in any form.  Ableism is just one “ism.”  If one of us is oppressed, all of us are oppressed.
10. Learn disability history.  Learn about the people and movements that made it possible for you to be in college.

iamthethunder:

graphicallyill:

I love this paper my disability department gave me. The representative also told me to report ANY kind of ableism, even if it seems minuscule to me.

The top three are hard to read so:

  1. Disability accommodations are rights, not special help. (Ask for what you need. Advocate for yourself.)
  2. You are an important and valuable part of campus diversity. (Diversity includes disability.)
  3. College disability services officers can be gatekeepers. (Most are good allies for students, but some are not. Demand professional, individualized, respectful services and file a complaint if you don’t get them.)

Captioning the rest for screenreader accessibility:

4. Feed your soul and body- recharge your batteries.  Balance your valuable time, energy, and health.

5. Stay focused on your career.  If it won’t help you get a job or maintain your passion for college, don’t bother.

6. Find a community.  Never go it alone.  Consider connecting with others who have disabilities.

7. Universally design your own learning.  Learn how you learn best, and then use your strengths and unique learning style.

8. Never apologize for your disability or your accommodations.  If you apologize, people may think you are ashamed.

9. Fight oppression and bullying in any form.  Ableism is just one “ism.”  If one of us is oppressed, all of us are oppressed.

10. Learn disability history.  Learn about the people and movements that made it possible for you to be in college.