I am frustrated. I am bisexual, but I lean more towards women. I have dated mostly men in the past. I am ready to date women. I feel in my heart/gut that this is just the period in my life when I need to explore being with women. I value my times with men, but it’s just not what I’m feeling right now. I need to honor that. It’s hard to remember that when I make a connection with a man. It’s hard to remember that when it seems like every single man that I meet falls in love with me at first sight. (I think I’m going to start a tumblr account called Fat Heartbreaker.) Where I need to shift my perspective is that I worry that every time I say, “no” to a man that I am losing out on something wonderful and I will be alone for the rest of my life, but this is not true and deep down I know it. What is really true is that every recent male relationship leads me back to thinking about women and so I am already losing out on something wonderful, because I am not fully invested in the straight relationship. Furthermore, I will only be alone for the rest of my life romantically speaking if I continue in this way. I need to look at my saying no to men as an opportunity to say yes to women.
Saying no to men is an opportunity to say yes to women!
I don’t write about my sexuality often, but I am writing about my frustrations here, because no one I have talked has really been able to relate specifically with what I am going through, but I figure someone out there is and maybe this post can be of some help.”
Today is World Suicide Prevention Day, but it should be every day. Prevent suicide by being willing to listen, by picking up the phone if feeling suicidal, by putting one foot in front of the other until the awful moment passes…and I guarantee it will. National Suicide Hotline is 1-800-273-8255